I don't think anyone will ever find these things of mine unless I tell them where to look. It's hard these days, in a never ending whirlwind of technology to sit down with a pen and paper and just let everything out. And I need to. I need to for myself and for the recovery of my brain. It's not proper to keep so many ideas and secrets inside of my head all the time.
Friends are friends but who wants to listen to a broken record stuck on complaints.
I don't complain a lot, really. I just have a lot of issues I need to get over. I'm not bitter, I just need to let things out sometimes. I always did write and I'm busy all the time but I've made a resolution about ten months too late to take more time out for myself instead of throwing myself into my work all the time.
You know, I did that last week. I did art. I haven't done anything like that in over a year because nursing school is pretty much a death sentence for any kind of hobby. It's worth it, I have to remind myself of that every day but I miss making things with my hands. I threw myself into a project last week to get my mind off of stupid things and it actually really helped. I felt refreshed and accomplished at the end of it all and you know what, I got recognition. It isn't easy for me to show people anything I make. To some people, maybe it was just a Halloween costume. I had to admit to it. I had to say I made it. It was me. And while I was proud of it, all my things I make always stay in my room...my safe place. The place only I go.
So I guess that's my goal with this blogging thing. I've been known to suck at keeping up with things in the past but I need to make a conscious effort in keeping myself sane.
My whole life is a mess. I finally feel like I'm getting to know myself and it took me 28 years to get here.
Friends are friends but who wants to listen to a broken record stuck on complaints.
I don't complain a lot, really. I just have a lot of issues I need to get over. I'm not bitter, I just need to let things out sometimes. I always did write and I'm busy all the time but I've made a resolution about ten months too late to take more time out for myself instead of throwing myself into my work all the time.
You know, I did that last week. I did art. I haven't done anything like that in over a year because nursing school is pretty much a death sentence for any kind of hobby. It's worth it, I have to remind myself of that every day but I miss making things with my hands. I threw myself into a project last week to get my mind off of stupid things and it actually really helped. I felt refreshed and accomplished at the end of it all and you know what, I got recognition. It isn't easy for me to show people anything I make. To some people, maybe it was just a Halloween costume. I had to admit to it. I had to say I made it. It was me. And while I was proud of it, all my things I make always stay in my room...my safe place. The place only I go.
So I guess that's my goal with this blogging thing. I've been known to suck at keeping up with things in the past but I need to make a conscious effort in keeping myself sane.
My whole life is a mess. I finally feel like I'm getting to know myself and it took me 28 years to get here.
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